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Tuesday November 28, 2006

Something to drink to . . .

IF the dire predictions had been right, we'd now be wallowing around our streets, ankle-deep in vomit, incapable of going to work and desperate for our next fix of alcohol. The licensing law changed a year ago, potentially permitting 24-hour pubs. The Daily Mail led the charge (as it so often does), claiming that the end of civilisation as we know it was just a couple of crème de menthes away.

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Gurn . . . you're on telly

THERE’S something about a television camera that makes some people go very odd. The very sight of one makes normally-sensible folk gurn. They stand in the background and wave. If we’re on a road, they beep their horns. In fact, car after car, lorry after lorry, beep their horns.

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A word to the wise

HERE’S some good news for those of you who think education standards are slipping. I’ve just spent some time with my six-year-old niece. She loves learning to spell and do arithmetic. A bit weird, perhaps.

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Lazy and so English

IT’S not so long since it was generally seen as a jolly good thing (at least for the people doing it – normally Europeans) to stomp into another land, stick up a flag, teach the natives about their version of God and perhaps sell the biggest and fittest of them into slavery. But these days it’s usually seen as pretty bad form to march into someone else’s country and say: “Hello chaps, we’re in charge now.”

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A funny sense of humour

TALKING of the legacy the British have left in their colonies . . . I was amazed to see what was running five nights a week on Cypriot television.

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Classy problem

I WENT to Didsbury to talk to people there about anti-social behaviour in the area. Many of them didn’t want to talk. The middle classes are far less likely to talk to the media than the working classes – especially about this sort of thing.

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Ban the fridge

I’VE been pondering what causes most of today’s modern ills and I’ve come to the conclusion that it’s not drugs, alcohol, unplanned pregnancy or even Nikki from Big Brother. It’s the fridge.

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